Wednesday, December 01, 2004

You were lost, or I was...

Where have you been child? While I have been here, in this filthy city. I looked for you but could not find you. I walked and prayed for your return. I crossed an entire country because I thought that maybe I had left you behind somewhere far away. Maybe on some previous journey. Or maybe I felt that if I left my worries you would find me, and we could move on together. I didn't know what drove you away or if I even needed you still. Maybe this was just a part of life's process, but it all happened so suddenly and expectedly. I had no choice but to look.
I realized later that I didn't drive you off. Leaving wasn't even a choice you made. You just didn't recognize me anymore and became lost yourself. I wept once, picturing you wandering these dirty dark streets alone. Looking for me. Maybe you would even follow me at times, thinking I resembled that man that you wanted to be. The man who once guarded and grew your hopes and dreams. After a while I lost you completely though, and you lost me.
But someone watched over you while I was away and we were separated and I am grateful for that. And when I was at my worst. When I had been wounded the deepest and realized that you were what I was missing, we were reunited and I finally realized who you were and why I needed you. You were wounded too I think because you are quieter and somehow sad in your own way. But you're my anchor in this stirred sea. My compass in this wilderness and I know that I can do nothing good without you and that the closer I am to being you, the better we both are. We can become who we were meant to be. Who we both dreamed of being.

4 comments:

Thomas Ham said...

dude, bro, dawg, homie.

no more vague poetry on your emotions. just go out and say "this person sucks, i hate this, you smell, i love so and so, this tastes yummy"... you know you want to be blunt (or smoke one!?!). j/k

Anonymous said...

I wish I knew the true thoughts behind your not-so obvious words.
Hope you're having a great day..
~Robin

Katie Harris said...

Hi pieter. It's Katie. Let's chat.

Pete said...

I don't have any desire to write anything other that stuff about my emotions...or pouring out of them...it's about as real as i can be.